The Little NotQuite Holidays
by Holli-chan
Summary: We all know those little viral not-quite holidays are ridiculous, but SOMEBODY'S gotta celebrate them, right? Pointless little mostly-unrelated Death Note blurbs about little holidays celebrated by some of the chars. Yaoi, Pointless Innuendo and Crack.
1. November 19th

**A/N: Well, um... I really have no explanation for starting this little collection of one-shots, except I find those little holidays that not many people really even acknowlage at all that somehow pop up in pop-culture from time to time extremely amusing... and somehow this just... I dunno. I heard about this one at school, so yeah... these will be *very* short just FYI. These really *should* go in Much Ado about Somethings, but for one reason or another that collection has been irking me lately... and I have plans to keep this one going so... yeah. :P But don't expect consistently either...**

**Disclaimer: I know it's REALLY hard to believe, but I do *not* own Death Note. Please don't cry, I really didn't want to ruin the spirit of it for you, but you were getting to the age where you were going to find out eventually anyway... :'C  
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**Charries: L and Light  
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1. Make Someone Feel Uncomfortable Day _(November 19th)_  
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L sat down quite happily to eat his cupcake, a genuine little grin on his face. It wasn't often he acted so giddy, but it had been a while since he had a homemade cupcake and he had made this one _all by himself_.

It was really a great accomplishment for the greatest detective to ever live if he did say so himself.

Eying the perfect OCD-prepared buttermilk icing and beautiful chocolate cake he peeled the paper off of the cupcake, sliding it until it was by its lonesome and ready for eating, sitting nimbly on the palm of his hand. Though it drove him mad and made his mouth water, he sat there for a moment to appreciate the beauty of it, whispering to himself, "Mmm… I do love icing…"

Beside him, Light turned around and, after a glance at the cupcake, then at L's ecstatic face, he said sneakily, "You know… I can think of a whole _different_ kind of icing you enjoy quite a lot too…"

L froze. He eyed the cupcake for a long time, his body ridged and stony; then slowly, very slowly, he sat the treat down and turned to Light. The expression on his face was completely crestfallen as he cried, "WHY, DAMMIT, WHY? You've ruined it! I can't possibly enjoy it now!"

Light only snickered and turned away, returning to his work. In the corner of his eye he watched with a smirk as L mournfully picked up the cupcake and scraped the icing off into the trashcan. He loved the holidays.


	2. ALSO November 19th

**A/N: Uh... No comment except that I was half asleep when i wrote this and honestly I didn't intend on Mello being naked but it just... well, just read it, there's nothing graphic unless you let your pervy little imaginations go there.  
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**Disclaimer: DERP.**

**Charries: Matt and Mello

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**2. Hug A Ginger Day **_**(Also November 19**__**th**__**)**_

Matt absolutely hated this holiday. Hated it to _no end,_ for some obvious reasons. First off, he was somehow the only ginger in Wammys, or at least the only one anyone ever cared to notice the existence of. Second, he hated hugs – in fact, he hated contact in general from everyone except for Mello. So getting chased down the halls by orphans screaming "HUG A GINGER DAY, GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE GINGER-BOY!" wasn't exactly appealing to say the least…

It was the year previous to his thirteenth year (his twelfth) that he decided to just lock himself in his room from then on on this day. It was also, coincidentally, the day that Mello decided to participate – a large group of boys at the orphanage devised a way to chart how many hugs they could get, had made it into a _contest_ of sorts. And everyone knew that Mello loved to win… and he also just happened to have his own personal ginger at his disposal.

This resulted in Matt being chased down the hall by not only a bunch of annoying children but Mello himself. The bad thing was, though Matt was faster than he looked and could outrun all the children if he wanted to (even Mello) he tired after a while and Mello knew all his hiding spots. And when he found him, it wasn't exactly quiet – it usually resulted in Mello glomping him and yelling "STOP RUNNING AWAY, TWAT! Oh, and POINT FOR ME!" and Matt shrieking "GET OFF, GET OFF, YOUR HAND IS ON MY GROIN!" or something along those lines – which would of course alert every participating child in the orphanage to go chasing after him again, thus recycling the process. Matt hated it – hated it – because there was always those few people that _did _catch him after class, and he couldn't avoid them _in_ class because he had to stay in the room. He hated it.

Hated it.

_Hated_ it.

Luckily, he had come to the resolution that he would simply lock himself in his room for the day. And so, grinning ear to ear, Matt crossed slammed the door shut and locked the door, throwing the key to the ground and ignoring the way it skidded under the bed. He could get it when he felt like leaving the room (it wouldn't unlock without the key, so really he was locked _in_ too) which he knew wouldn't be for a while. Or at least, he didn't think he would want to leave soon…

That is, until Mello strolled out of the bathroom with a confused look on his face, wearing only a towel and a droopy look on his face. "Matty, why'd you lock the door?"

Matt immediately flushed, spinning to stare incredulously at Mello. Why was he still there? He always left early, so he had assumed… seeing the look on Matt's face, Mello grinned at him, popping one hip and raising the opposite eyebrow with an amused grin. "Matt, you dumbass – Roger called off class today."

"Oh, right… I knew that," Matt lied nervously, trying to avoid looking anywhere but Mello's face – difficult, since Mello was only in a towel and, oh yeah, Matt was completely gay. After a few seconds of staring at him, he dared the question, "Uh, why exactly…?"

Mello seemed to blank out for a second, causing a lapse in the conversation as well as the towel to drop slightly (making it increasingly difficult to keep his eyes up) until Mello's face finally lit up. "Oh! Right! Hug a Ginger day!"

_Great. He remembers. Nice job, Matt,_ Matt scolded himself as Mello eyed him, blue eyes glittering with mischief as well as curiosity. "So is… that why you locked the door?" Mello inquired, innocence lacing his voice.

This "innocence" proved that Mello was up to no good, because there was _never_ innocence in his voice unless he put it there to trip him up. Matt swallowed hard.

"Uh… yeah."

"To… keep everyone else out."

"Yeah! You know I hate people…"

Now, Mello's eyes narrow. "But you thought I was outside."

Matt stopped cold at the wicked look on Mello's face, struggling against himself to stop from taking a step back since that would only provoke the blonde. Was he forgetting he was walking around, dripping wet, in only a towel? Matt swallowed hard again. "Uh, I um… I would have let you in…"

Mello grinned so wide and wicked it might make the Cheshire Cat green with jealousy. "Oh really now? Why's the key under the bed if you were so ready to let me back in, hmm?"

Matt fell silent and blushed, biting his lip, for he had no response to that question. Before he could conjure up any excuse or even attempt to change the topic Mello suddenly pounced on him, throwing him into a tight, constricting hug around the waist, face buried into his chest immediately. Matt froze, blushing with surprise at the sudden contact (at least he wasn't being violent…?). This blush went from pink to red as he realized Mello had stopped holding up the towel behind in favor of using both arms to hug him with, so the only thing holding the fabric up was his own legs against Mello's.

"Uhm… Mel…" Matt croaked, feeling the blush had to be reaching even his ears.

Mello giggled against his shirt, peering up at the ridged Matt, of whom was obviously trying (in vain) not to look at nor move further against Mello's naked body. "You can't get away from me that easily, Matty," he purred, rubbing his nose against Matt's neck. The redhead's blush grew deeper. "But... did you really want to?"

"N-n-nah, I love you too much f-for that," Matt replied simply – he found it would be pointless to lie to the blonde, since it would only keep him clinging there longer. No, he did most certainly not want him gone. This answer drew a giant grin to Mello's features now and, much to Matt's complete embarrassment as well as surprise, the blonde reached around his neck and kissed him on the ear.

"Happy Hug a Ginger Day," Mello mumbled against his ear, followed by an almost cruel chuckle as he pulled Matt into another tighter, clingier hug in complete ignorance of actual clothing.

The redhead shivered and, unable to really control himself any longer, wrapped his arms around Mello and returned the hug, a grin spreading across his face because he couldn't help himself.

Matt absolutely loved this holiday.

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**A/N: Dumb, I know, but the idea came to me and it wouldn't leave me alone D: this one came up a lot at school today too… XDD poor Callie, she was our only ginger friend. It was also apparently Hug a Mormon day, in which case I hugged a lot of Mormons at my school but couldn't find a way to incorporate it into death note so I won't. Hopefully some more interesting holidays will come up for me to write about! :D so, i have to ask... any gingers out there for me to virtu-glomp?  
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	3. November 21st

**Disclaimer: If I owned Death Note, it would have a mature content warning on MangaFox and some very upset parental figures.  
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**Charries: Matt and Mello

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**3. World Hello Day **_**(November 21**__**st**__**)**_

Matt couldn't believe his eyes. He couldn't believe them to the extent that he continuously rubbed his eyes and pinched himself to confirm reality. But no, it was true: what he was seeing was _actually happening._

Mello, his Mello, his crazy, freaky, mocking, temperamental roommate Mello… was being _friendly to people._ _Other_ than _him._ Incredibly shocking, no?

Well, Matt was certainly surprised.

But, as shocking as it was, there it was in front of his eyes, Mello strolling down the hall and stopping in front of everyone he saw, lifting his hand in a wave, and saying in an almost sickeningly cheerful voice, "Hello!" Girls, boys, little kids, older kids, strangers, acquaintances, teachers, orphans, Roger, even _Near_ had received a hello. Needless to say this uncharacteristic behavior attracted a lot of what-the-fuck expressions from equally surprised people receiving hellos, and not many of the greetings were returned with such glee, but Mello didn't seem to care – he just kept on his expedition through the hallway, greeting everyone he said with the same generic, cheerful "Hello!" each time.

Matt, who had been watching from a distance for some time now, almost couldn't resist the urge to run over and shake him, shrieking at the top of his lungs, "WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MELLO, GOD DAMN IT!_" _He resisted, however, because if he did it this sudden revelation of niceness might actually _end_ and as much as Matt enjoyed keeping Mello to himself he would hate to have the blonde suddenly snap completely upon contact and kill everyone in the room. Judging by the sparkling hellos he was exchanging with everyone that didn't seem likely _then_, but that boy had proved once again he was unpredictable…

Just as he was about to march over and demand explanation from Mello (as gently as possible of course…) Mello spun around with a surprised look on his face and dashed down the hall to greet _him_ instead, again with the joyful "Hello!" though this one sounded more genuine than the ones he had given to most of the other students he'd watched. Matt stood stiff and inexplicable as Mello threw him into a quick hug before looking at him with an expectant expression.

Matt could only stare back. "What?"

"Well aren't you going to say hello back, Matty?" Mello inquired a bit despondently, fluttering his eyelashes in that flirty way he did only when he was trying to get what he wanted. _Some things never change…_

As tempting as it was to just give in and play along, Matt only frowned at him, raising an apprehensive eyebrow. "Not until you tell me when we suddenly showed up in a scene from _The Body Snatchers,_ no, I'm not," he replied, frowning. Mello returned the frown.

"Didn't I tell you?" Mello inquires, looking genuinely confused.

Matt gives him the blandest look he can conjure up. "Mello, you never tell me _anything_ important, you just assume I'll go with anything you do regardless," he reminds him insipidly.

The blonde gives him a blank look for a long, drawn out moment before he grins again, this time his usual condescending smirk. "Oh yeah," Mello chuckles, "I forgot – you do." When Matt apparently didn't see the humor in any of this, continuing to give him a bland look, Mello sighed and rolled his eyes. "It's World Hello Day, Matty_. Duhh_." He said if this were obvious.

Matt rolled his eyes at his friend, shoving his hands in his back pocket with a disbelieving chuckle. "Duh? Are you seriously suggesting that I should have known this already?" By the look on Mello's face, apparently he did. "Mello, who even celebrates that stupid holiday?"

The other paused for a long time, tapping his finger to his lips. "Hmm…" he mumbled, as if really trying to come up with an answer, then broke this faux expression with a snigger. "Me, of course."

"Moron," Matt chuckled affectionately, shaking his head.

Mello crosses his arms stubbornly at this, lip sticking out in an exaggerated pout. "I'm not a moron, moron. It's a cause to support the dumbass governments actually talking and communicating with each other and the people they're suppose to be protecting instead of throwing themselves into shit," he explained irately.

"Tch, well then," Matt chuckles, shaking his head. Then, seemingly out of the blue (though really the idea had been poking around in his mind for a while now after Mello said 'national hello day') Matt slipped forward until they were nose to nose, a giant grin on his face. The stubborn pout on Mello's face washes away to a surprised smirk as Matt hangs his arms over Mello's shoulders and whispers, "Well then, Happy World Hello Day to you, Mello… French style." And then, because he just couldn't resist, Matt leans forward and kisses Mello twice, once on each cheek, before resting his forehead on the other's with a giant grin.

Mello blushes, though he tries to make up for this with a smirk. "You're so cute."

Matt chuckles and moves to pull away then, only to have Mello's arms lock around his waist, pulling him close again so that their noses are touching, this time making it his boyfriend's turn to be blushing. "You know, there's a little thing called _French Kissing_ that might be a nice little holiday treat…" he whispers against his lips, pulling his hips closer to his.

As much as he doesn't want to, Matt twists his head away, face burning with blush as his eyes avert away to his surroundings, only to have himself blush more. "Uh, Mello," he whispered constrictedly, trying to ignore Mello's hot breath on his cheek, "We're in the middle of the hallway – people are watching…"

Mello blinked, feigning surprise. "Oh?" he inquired, tilting his head slightly to observe but still not allowing Matt any space. Indeed there was a cluster of students staring at them from the side giving them disbelieving looks and muttering among themselves, a few girls exchanging fangirl squeals, and one boy pretending to throw up. Mello, clearly amused, twists his head around, flashes a giant, sparkling grin at all of them, and shouts, "HELLO!"

The crowd scatters and, much to Matt's discomfiture, Mello then goes back to his own special little greeting, right there in the hallway.

Ah, yes. Mello loved the holidays.

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**A/N: I admit it: I had too much fun writing this XD if anyone has holiday suggestions that'd be awesome, but there's no guarantee they'll be used.**


	4. April 23rd

**Disclaimer: I don't own Matt and Mello, but if I did, they'd be (CENSORED FOR INAPPROPRIATE CONTENT HERE). CB EDIT: Oh, and I also don't own Shakespeare's Romeo Juliet, obviously, there are many direct quotes from his play here. So yeah.  
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**A/N: Yeah… I'm aware these aren't in chronological order… at all… shut up. XD**

**Holiday Recommendation Courtesy Of: Atreyl**

**Chars in This: Matt and Mello (again XD)

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**4. Talk Like Shakespeare Day (April 23)**

After living with Mello the majority of your life, not a lot of things surprise you. Not getting an egg in the face on a random morning because you slept in far too long and your boyfriend got bored, not coming home to Mello passed out from apparently masturbating too much, not Near coming into the room in nothing but tighty-whities demanding Mello return his clothing immediately and _no he was not going to wear that dress he left in his closet either._

Really, preceding all of those things, Mello shouldn't have been at all surprised when he woke up to Mello's voice through the window of their apartment exactly three stories downwards.

"Matty-o, oh Matty-o, where for art thou Matty-o? Deny thy father and refuse thy name; or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I'll no longer be a catapult!"

Matt raised his eyebrows in shock, stifling a surprised bought of laughter as he hurried to his balcony (how ironic) and peered over the edge, smirking at the blonde who was currently standing at the sidewalk beside their hotel, hand raised in a rather melodramatic way. (He he, melodramatic, get it?) Smirk widening, Matt called back, "It's _Capulet, _Mello, and that's _Juliet's_ part – shouldn't you be on the balcony, you crazy bastard?"

Mello sniffed indigently, throwing his hair over his shoulder with poise that only he could accomplish with such an act. "Whatever, assha—errm, I doth mean… that of which thou speaks doth neither matter nor be relevant, for is thou not as much a man as I?"

Matt smirk widened, leaning over the edge with a certain twinkle in his eyes as he recited, "_Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at this…_ Melliet?"

Mello seemed to have trouble refusing the smirk that tugged his lips, peering up at the just-awoken redhead with what could only be described as a look of upmost affection. "Thou is comeith down thou stairs to meet thou's Melliet then, dearest Matty-o?"

Matty grins and winks at Mello, tossing him a teasing, "Thou's dear Shakespeare has done slippith, my lovely Melliet," his way before hurrying into the apartment to change out of his 1-UP boxers and into some decent clothing as well as to escape the yell of "DOTH MATTY-O HAD BEST GET THOU'S JUSTMENTAL ASS DOWN HERE!"

Once Matt had hastily changed into decent clothing (or as decent as you'd consider his usual attire) he ran down the stairs (the elevator was shit and full of old people, so) and threw himself at Mello, hugging him tightly in his arms from behind. Said blonde immediately shrieked in surprise, attempting to wriggle away for a moment before evidently giving up and going lax in his arms, realizing quickly who it was when the redhead pressed his lips to his ear and mumbled, "O! She doth teach the torches to burn bright."

Mello tried to fight the smile tugging on his lips, twisting his head and planting a tiny kiss on his lover's lips, ignoring the stares and rude gestures being thrown their way from pedestrians while he did, and mumbling into the kiss, "Not passing o'er the bounds of modesty, Matty-o?"

Matt grinned, breaking the kiss but not so far that they were not still nose to nose as he whispered, "It's… _stepping_, my love."

"Shut thou's mouth or Melliet shall shuttith it for you," he replied simply, blue eyes glittering happily. Matt rolled his eyes at this and, for whatever reason completely compelled by this exchange, he snatched Mello into a bridal-style carrying and promptly strolled through the crowd back to the apartment, ignoring the continuing not-so-great attention (and the fangirls, too, there were always those, not that Matt ever called that _good…_) as well as Mello's livid struggling until they reached the room, where he tossed him onto the bed with a grin.

Mello raised his eyebrows as Matt pulled off his shirt, tossing it to the floor with that same confident smirk on his face; for a moment Mello seemed to forget his sudden Shakesperian dialect, inquiring, "What the heck, Matt?"

"Well, Melliet," Matt began slyly, crawling onto the bed to lay bside the blonde, running his hand over to touch the others with a certain light in his eyes that did little to surprise the blonde at that point but still caused a tingle to go down Mello's spine as he whispered, "I will lie with thee tonight."

_I'm pretty sure that's not how it went down in the play,_ Mello thinks suspiciously. But what he says is, "What satisfaction canst thou have tonight?"

Matt's grin grew and, drawing himself over to his lover with only a quiet reply of, "Tempt not a desperate man," he pressed his lips onto the other boys and lowered himself so that he was over the other, hand still clutching Mello's. The blonde hummed into the kiss and returned it with enough passion for the both of them, but then, Matt had enough passion to double it anyway. Slowly Matt drew himself even closer into the kiss, one hand coming to the side of Mello's face, tracing his hand over the rough texture of the scar there and the place where it ebbed away to soft porcelain skin. That, he knew, was far fom the worst scar his lover bore, however, for, he thought paradoxically, _he jests at scars that never felt a wound._

To Mello's quiet displeasure, though, Matt broke off the kiss, still nose to nose with the other. Something, to Mello's surprise, however, had changed in his gaze when their eyes met.

"I dreamt my lady came and found me dead," he whispered, drawing a hand across to brush the stray blonde hairs from his lover's face. Mello's blue eyes glimmered with a lost kind of expression for a moment, but he focused enough to slowly register what was on Matt's mind at the deep, serious emerald gaze staring back at him.

"What sayest thou? Hast though not a word of joy?" Mello whispered back, drawing his arms carefully around the redhead's neck. The look in his eyes was almost pleading, begging him not to go on and say what he already knew must be true.

A small smile tugs on Matt's lips and he leans downwards, putting a loving and yet somehow chaste kiss on Mello's lips before drawing back just enough to speak, his breath still to be felt on the other's lips: "These violent delights have violent ends . . ."

Mello's throat closed up for a moment then, suffocating him, because he knew then all too well. "How art thou out of breath when thou hast breath to say to me that thou art out of breath? Is the news good or bad, answer to that." When he spoke those words, once heard so powerful in his mind, he had to think that his own voice, now breaking and quaking, did not convey them nearly as well. But Matt knew the meaning as well as any Romeo.

"Death, that hath sucked the honey of thy breath, hath had no power yet upon thy beauty," Matt whispered back, pressing his lips onto the border between Mello's scar and perfect cream of skin to catch the single crystal tear that had escaped the blonde's blue eyes without his even realizing it. After a moment of breathing in Mello's lavender-shampoo educed scent, he mumbled, "I know your plan to kidnap Takada. I'm going with you – I can't live without you. You know how the quote goes."

Mello choked out a sob, a rain of guilt falling over him because he knew he shouldn't have kept the plan on his laptop – he should have known Matt would check. Perhaps, in a way, Mello knows he wanted him to – because really, he's always been selfish.

"But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun," Mello answers quietly, feeling the meaning more than the words on his tongue.

Matt smiles still, even as he knows they speak of his death, _their_ death (Mello's perhaps far more painful than his own in his heart's dear opinion) and leans down to return to the kiss. This one is not chaste, far from it, and soon limbs are tangled in limbs, teeth clashing with teeth and clothes are tossed wildly across the room, their landing left to anybody's guess. They are wordless throughout, do not cry each others names nor whisper sweet nothings, the only words exchanged being but another quote from nowhere, escaping in the lost haze of frenzy from Mello's bruised lips: "Eyes, look your last! Arms, take your last embrace…"

The sex is frantic, desperate, loving, passionate, a grand finale to their love life. They'll be exhausted afterwards, but they have nothing to go to that day and when they are spent completely, their faces red from exhaust and overexertion, they simply lay there together in bed, listening to each other's breaths.

Though this moment is most tragic for the both of them Matt does not cry like Mello did throughout the process – the tears had only just stopped coming by the end of the sex – but he would not judge him. In fact, Matt had pretended not to see them entirely, save for catching them in their transparent cascade with his kisses when he had the chance. He pretended none of it was, instead simply savoring the then, the _now_, the _now_ that, for the time being, included holding the one he loved in his arms.

Mello manages a smile, nuzzling his face into Matt's chest and not caring how pathetic he sounds when he mumbles, "That which we call a rose by any other word would smell as sweet; so Romeo would, were he not Romeo called, retain that dear perfection to which he owes without that title…"

"Did my heart love 'til now? Forswear its sight. For I never saw true beauty 'til this night," Matt recites back, trying to keep back a bought of unpredicted laughter from bubbling past his throat at the irony of it all. For all the lack of romance he'd had with Mello previously, he had truly never expected Shakespeare quotes today.

But then, Mello nuzzles his nose against his chest again, mumbling softly, "Happy _Talk Like Shakespeare Day,_ Matty-o."

Matt quirks an eyebrow, peeking down at his lover with a surprised, confused expression. "Isn't… that in April, Melliet?"

"Hmm, yes," Mello chuckles back, reaching upwards to comb his hand through Matt's red mop of hair with a glitter in his blue eyes. "But I can't really wait till then to plagiarize Shakespeare to woe you, can I?"

Matt closes his eyes then and, because he cannot help himself any longer, he bursts into laughter; though he knows it is pointless now, he can find humor in this and though the end is nearer than even he thought for him he can still find joy in having his lover in his arms. And, to his upmost relief Mello laughs as well, the same chortling, maniac-esque laughter that Matt had fallen in love with all those years ago.

Despite knowing they will die, and that they will die not for themselves but for each other, they laugh, for what more can they do but enjoy the last little moments?

Really, Matt has to think, he does quite love the holidays.

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**A/N: How did this become depressing all of a sudden at the end? Hell, I don't know, but I blame Shakespeare. :P I probably abused and botched most of those quotes, but leave me be, I haven't even read the book XDDD**

**Oh and, random babble: Microsoft Word is such shit, it kept trying to correct SHAKESPERE'S grammar. Yeah. -_- not joking.**


	5. June 10th

**Disclaimer: Bitch, please.**

**A/N: Ummm... refer to the 1st one... if you don't understand the ending of this. :P**

**Holiday Recommendation: I... THINK Atreyl... right? XD**

**Chars in This One: L and Light (with mentions of the Task Force)

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**5. Ballpoint Pen Day (June 10)**

"Um, Light… is this really necessary?" L inquired from his place crouched on the office chair, eyeballing the brunette chained to him.

"YES, IT IS," Light cried, yanking on the chain as he ran from his desk to Matsuda's (which was vacant, since Matsuda had gone wherever it is that Matsuda goes for his lunch break) causing L to be rolled along with him thanks to the helpful office chair. L rolled his eyes as Light immediately yanked the drawer open and started rifling through its contents, throwing pencils, books, pens, and a My Little Pony Sticker Collection (what in god's name…?) aside in his search. When he apparently came up short Light hissed in irritation, shoving the drawer shut and dumping the cup on Matsuda's desk, which was full of many writing utensils.

L tilted his head monotonously to the side watching Light go through each of them, amused at the way he slowly grew more and more frustrated with each object he inspected. "Is it really so important you find a ballpoint pen _right now_, Light-kun?"

"Fuck…" Light muttered, tossing the cup astray with a frantic, frustrated expression on his face. "YES, it is," he said in answer to L's question, racing past him and dragging him along chain-wise to rifle through Mogi's desk next. It had similar results, though instead of My Little Pony stickers he found a giant cookbook and some sort of diary. As tempting as it was to read it, Light concentrated on finding his pen, instead tossing the diary backwards and nearly smacking poor L in the face with it.

L caught it as it flew past his shoulder, flipping it open to the first entry and raising his eyebrows (or, at least, where his eyebrows would be, if he had any). "It says here Mogi has a secret infliction with Shakira."

Light narrowed his eyes. "L, damn it, stop distrac…" he paused briefly, turning to look at L with a confused, disbelieving expression. "For real?" After a few seconds of staring at L he shook his head, and before the raven haired man could tell him yes, yes it did, the brunette turned away and continued rifling through the desks, the next victim being Aizawa's. Nothing out of the ordinary there, save for a stashed supply of hairspray, but that didn't surprise Light at all. Ide's desk held similar offerings, though he was temporarily surprised to find a pair of ladies underwear in there… he dismissed this, however, and quickly slid the drawer shut, spinning around to face L with a disgruntled expression.

"No ballpoint pens?" L inquired, tilting his head to the side again.

Light muttered something that sounded dangerously like _ducking fumbass _before spinning around and smashing his head into his own desk, letting out a strangled noise that sounded somewhat like a frustrated sob, nails digging into the desk. What evil Anti-God had cursed him this time? _What had he done to deserve this?_

Little did he know the very culprit was sitting right behind him on an office chair, the smirk playing across his pale lips hidden partially by shaggy black hair, thinking to the supply of ballpoint pens currently being shipped off to Goodwill. _That's for the cupcake, bastard._

L did quite enjoy the holidays after all._  
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**A/N: Umm… at least the pens are going to a good cause. –nods seriously- Yes yes.**

**Review…? :D**


	6. May 8th

**A/N: Um, yep. Hopefully this bought of random shit makes up for that emo-fest last chapter, but it probably doesn't. XDDD**

**Chars in This One: Mello, Near, Matt…oh, and Roger.**

**Holiday Recommendation Courtesy Of: Atreyl and Kari Twilight Mist (they both asked for it, so… XD)**

**Disclaimer: See the last last last one.

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**6. No Socks Day (May 8)**

"Oh! Hey, Matt, good for you, you remembered the day!"

Matt blinked lazily and looked up from his video games – he'd been playing all day and night for two days now, so he really honestly had no idea what the blonde was talking about. Still, Mello sounded pleased, so he smiled back and replied, "Sure, of course, right."

"Yup!" Mello chirped, heading for the door with a look of determination plastered on his face. Just as he reached the door, however, Matt's voice stopped him.

"Um, Mel, you realize you're not wearing any shoes or socks, right? You're barefoot."

Mello froze in the doorway, turning to give his boyfriend a highly irritated look. "You didn't remember at all, did you?" he accused blatantly, propping a hand on his hip and narrowing his eyes.

Matt shrugged and went back to his game, a guilty smile tugging on his lips. "Hmm, nope, not at all."

The blonde normally would have continued to drag on the argument over it or at the very least tickle the redhead into submission, but he had work to do this holiday and he could have none of that. So he set off to the halls, bare feet slapping on the hardwood floor of the orphanage in a strangely intimidating way as he walked, setting himself on a mission as he did. And, as he did with most dumb little holidays of the like, he stopped each time in the hallway to point an accusing finger at anyone that he could see socks on, yelling at them, "HEY, YOU!" This would always earn him a holy-shit-what-do-you-want-scary-boy? sort of expression and he would narrow his eyes and point to their feet, saying blatantly, "Take them off."

Most of them didn't ask (though if they did, he would explain) but all of them complied after a good glare-down. Because really, with only two options, go around barefoot or get pummeled by Mello, who really chose the later?

Well, apparently, Near.

"I have no wish to comply to such a ridiculous, phony holiday, as I prefer my feet to continue to be in their socks where they are the most comfortable. And, for the metaphorical record, I would like to point out that I do not appreciate the way you are peer pressuring me and the other students of the orphanage."

This, of course, caught the attention of most of the attention of the other children in the room, some blatantly staring and others discreetly peeking when they thought neither of them were looking (though really they should have known well enough they'd have noticed them, being the first and second at the house). All of them were sockless, and they hadn't complained, so they were surprised to see the frail boy doing it. Then again, this _was_ Near.

Mello himself stared at the albino boy with an air of utter disbelief as he blatantly refused his demand, not even looking up from his Lego-brick sculpture he was arranging on the library floor. He was in such disbelief, in fact, that utter shock shone through in his voice as he exclaimed, "Are you _serious?_ You're seriously refusing to _take off your socks_? For the sake of a _holiday?_ Are you _mad!_"

Near raised an eyebrow (or rather, the bone that would usually have an eyebrow), finally looking up from the Lego tower with the usual apathedic look on his face save for that single "eyebrow" raise. "I do not consider me to be especially out of my mind. Does _Mello_ find himself to be particularly insane? You are certainly behaving like it this morning."

"Well you're behaving like a douchebag!" Mello replied flatly and, without really thinking about it, kicked the Lego tower over to stand over the albino boy in a rather domineering way, blue eyes narrowed dangerously. "Take the socks off, sheep."

Near stared at him apathetically, the only sign of emotion being the slightest tilt of his head as he said blatantly, "No."

And that, reader, is how Near ended up on his stomach, flailing his limbs and shrieking helplessly with a certain blonde psycho on his back, nails digging into his leg as he yanked forcibly at the white fabric of Near's socks. Around the room there was a bustle of excitement, fear, and disbelief at the scene though Mello didn't even seem to notice, continuing on Mission No-Socks.

"Mello! Mello! Do not! Do not! Not want!" Near cried, for once reduced to mindless, helpless babbling. Mello, clearly thoroughly enjoying himself, leaned back to yank the socks complexly off, falling backwards and rolling to partially fall into the poor albino's head, causing Near's face to be smushed into the hardwood floor below.

"It's not even carpet…" Near whimpered as Mello burst into hysterics, raising the socks up in victory, shouting "HUZZAH!" at the top of his small child lungs. Several children even applauded, at least until one anonymous child yelled out:

"ROGER'S COMING DOWN THE HALLWAY! SCATTER!"

Mello immediately leapt to his feet and ran out the door, taking the socks with him and leaving the albino barefoot and crushed on the floor as children scattered to whatever place they were actually suppose to be, the sound of bare feet slapping against hardwood ringing in his ears.

Finally, Roger lumbered into the room, but he was only in time to find Near slowly getting into a sitting position and the last few children screeching into the hallways through the other entrance. The man sighed, running his hand through where his hair used to be before it thinned out so far there was nothing left but a feathers wisp of hair and dead skin. He was getting far too old for this.

"What happened?" Roger grumbled, eyeing the sole remaining person (Near), who was currently looking mournfully at his little toes, which were whiter even than the rest of his body since they never saw sunlight through his thick wool socks.

"Socks… stolen… they… gone…" Near mumbled pathetically, for once far too distraught to conjure up actual sentences. He couldn't think without his socks – it just couldn't happen. Roger stared at him in disbelief as Near looked up at him, gray eyes wide and desperate for help.

Roger felt a sweatdrop roll down his forehead, scratching the back of his head. "I don't know what to say, Near, it _is_ No Socks Day…"

Near groaned and leaned his head heavily against the desk, a deep sigh escaping his lungs. It was going to be a long day.

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**A/N: Somehow, I just couldn't resist making Near a blubbering idiot for a few minutes there. XDD SO OCC, but oh well.**


	7. January 14

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note, Laura Croft/Tomb Raider, Samus/Metriod Prime, Princess Peach/Mario, or Buffy the Vampire Slayer.**

**A/N: Yep, here we are again X3 **

**Special Thanks To: ATREYL, for being awesome in general and for hooking me up with a refrence website for a crapload of holidays. CB**

**Chars In This One: Matt and Mello

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**7. Dress Up Your Pet Day (January 14)**

"Why… was this really necessary?" Matt whined, bunching his hands into fists as his face turned nearly as red as his face.

Across the room Mello only beamed, taking yet another picture of Matt with his phone as he chirped, "Mm-hmm, totally necessary! It's for the holiday." Mello winked. "Now turn around, I want to see your ass in that spandex!"

Matt's face turned even redder at the comment – he wanted to punch Mello, or at least whine and stomp his foot like a little girl, but instead he simply turned around and did as he was asked. He always did, he supposed – this was _Mello,_ and it was next to impossible to argue with him.

"Okay, okay, look over your shoulder now!" Mello insisted, waving the camera insistently. Matt's face flushed more but he complied, looking over his shoulder and giving Mello his best you-are-so-dead glower. Mello's face lit up. "Ohh, sexy!" he chirped, taking a picture.

So the glower failed epically… Matt sighed, shaking his head and putting his hands on his hips. "Was it _really _necessary to dress me up like Samsus? Really?" he complained, pulling uselessly at the skin-tight blue spandex on his hips, wincing as it snapped back into place insistently.

Mello giggled. "Oh please, don't complain, everyone knows you have the hots for her, you nerd."

"Having the hots is _not the same_ as wanting to cosplay them!" Matt shrieked, blushing even more furiously and turning around, meaning to wave his arms in the hair angrily, but he was blinded by the flash of Mello's camera before he could.

The blonde snickered. "Fine, let's take a break," he offered, shoving the camera into his…pants… he doesn't have pockets, okay? Just leave it. He waited until Matt sighed with relief and dived onto the couch in a flop before adding, "So, what do you want next? Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Laura Croft?"

Matt groaned loudly. "But I've already gone through Princess Peach, the maids costume, the suit and tie, Jack Sparrow, and now Samus… can't I have a break?"

"Hmm…" Mello murmured, putting his finger to his lips as if considering it, eyes raking over Matt. Man, that spandex _was_ right… Slowly, Mello lowered himself onto the couch, blatantly eyeing Matt's body with lustful, considering eyes.

Matt could tell that Mello was starting to balance over his hormones or his pictures, and quite frankly Matt would rather be having sex than doing this again. And so, slowly, he lifted himself up and slid his hand across his hips and thighs, drooping his eyes at Mello flirtatiously. "Mmmm, I think taking a break would be pretty…. _Fun_, don't you?"

Mello's face flushed and he quickly crossed his legs, averting his eyes. _Shit._

Matt grinned victoriously, knowing he'd won at least a bit of a break, and shifted forward, pressing his lips against Mello's neck. And, just to seal the deal, he whispered against the blonde's neck, "You can be on top tonight, too."

Mello grinned and slid his arm around Matt's spandex-covered waist, pulling him to his side and bringing him into a hungry kiss. After a few minutes of heavy making out Matt broke it off to breath, face completely red from exertion and lack of oxygen as he panted, "Wait… what holiday _is _this anyway… Mell...?"

The blonde grinned wickedly, grinding his hips against the redhead's, making the other gasp and go limp, face burning with blush. When Mello saw that Matt was weak from the friction he leaned over and whispered into his ear: "Dress up your pet day."

Matt squeaked in surprise and irritation, eyes narrowing into a pouty glare. "Mello! I'm a human being!"

"Heh. There's that sexy face again," Mello mumbled thoughtfully. Then, without regarding Matt's comment in the slightest, he yanked off his vest and tossed it aside before quickly returning to ravishing the ever-flustered Matt.

By the end of it, Matt had to admit he kind of liked the holidays.

**A/N: …how does everything I write turn out perverted?**

**p.s. You all know Matt would have the hots for Samus. You know it's true. XDDD Even if he's totally gay, everyone thought Samus was a dude at first anyway. XDD INFLICTION FAILURE? Yes.**


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